DARVO hypothetical

Domestic Violence takes many forms, this is one fictional form…

victim states “i’m being hurt by the person xyz, who is doing this and this.”

xyz states, “i’m being hurt by that accusation, i’ve never done that or that.”

authority states “there is plausible doubt, therefore I’m going to file the matter, and do no more investigation.”

auto automobile blur buildings
17 reports to the police about domestic violence before the perpetrator gest charged ONCE.

victim states “they’ve hurt me again just now when xyz did this and this.”

xyz states “that is an isolated incident, only happened once, and they provoked me this time by mentioning the incident from last week.”

authority states “there remains plausible doubt, therefore we can only file this matter, and do no more investigation.”

person holding a gavel
my judgement is that you have not shown beyond reasonable doubt in this matter, go away.

victim states “no matter what I do, xyz continues to belittle me in front of people, I feel horrible all the time and find it really hard to speak up.”

xyz states “if you had more confidence you would find speaking up is easy, all i’ve ever done is try to help you with self improvement. toughen up and face reality.”

victim states “i feel confident that when you attack me in public or at home, claiming to be trying to improve me, that I actually feel less confident and am embarrassed by what you say to me. I hurt every time you tell me off, and I cannot do anything right.”

xyz states “im not even telling you off, that is you just being too sensitive, i’m trying to help you self improve yourself and become a smarter and better person.”

man holding balance scale
On the balance of probabilities is less strict than beyond reasonable doubt.

victim states “I used to be fine about myself, but now days all i feel is utterly horrible, and I’m too scared to speak up because everytime I do, you deny your responsibility, you go on the attack and then you claim you are the victim and I’m hurting you.”

xyz states, “that is because im trying to help you, it is your responsibility to improve, you’re scared because fundamentally you’re a coward with mental health issues and anxiety, just get over your exaggerated sensitivity and you won’t get hurt so much in these matters.”

victim states “i’m standing up to you, and you’ve been attacking me for years, time and time again you hurt me with your attacks upon my character. I like being me, stop attacking my character, i’m quite happy with the way I am.”

xyz states, “there you go again, you’ve just said you are quite happy with having mental health issues and being cowardly, that is not a good way to be. You should seek a mental health professional.”

victim states, “i’ve been chatting with counsellors on 1800respect already and they told me about DARVO. See you in court.”

xyz states, “Court? You lying scum, i’ve tried to help you time and time again, you just aren’t intelligent enough to understand these matters! My lawyers will deny your allegations, attack your character, and reveal that I am the victim and you are the offender.”


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